If you're going to read much on my blog, you're guaranteed to hear a lot about horses. Horses are wonderful - they are patient, kind, forgiving, and they fill a part of my life that can’t be filled with anything else.

I’ve been obsessed with horses since I can remember. Back when my love affair with horses began, I probably couldn’t have put into a comprehensive set of words and sentences what horses meant to me and why I was drawn to them like a moth to light. Even now I don’t feel that words can express the set of emotions that fill my soul when I’m in the presence of these four-legged, fuzzy-maned miracles. So to explain my heart a little more, and to invite you to understand the blessing that horses are, I’ve attempted to compose a short essay about horses, and one special horse in particular.

Horses are good for the soul. Some of my highest highs have been created on horseback. I still remember the feeling after my best jumping round at a horse show - the high of experiencing the pure partnership of me and my horse, the pure bliss of time spent in the air of the 1.35m jumps, and the joy of seeing the smile on my trainer’s face as we left the arena. Alternately, if I have something tough going on in my life, one of the most therapeutic things to do is a bareback trail ride with nothing but the sound of birds in the trees and hooves on the ground as I allow my heart to process and grieve, if necessary. If I’m stressed, the barn is my safe place where I can go to feel some peace and to quiet my racing mind. I’ve cried into horses’ manes after break ups, I’ve shared laughs with friends as we raced up hills, I’ve seen sunsets through horses ears and thanked God for allowing me the gift of experiencing life this way.

One of my favorite aspects of riding is the never-ending quest for knowledge. As a horseman and as a rider, you never are 100% "there". There's always more to learn, because like people, all horses think differently, act differently, respond to situations differently. You have to be ready to actually feel what is going on and to anticipate and respond accordingly. There are more schools of thought and training techniques than can be counted, and some training methods work with certain kinds of horses but not others. There are always ways that you can ride more “correctly” - is your leg in the right place? Did you lengthen stride enough to get to the jump correctly? Did you soften your rein at the right moment? But the wonderful thing is, when you get to know a horse really well, you don’t have to think so much about the head knowledge stuff. In fact, if you do, your head will get in the way of your feel. When you know a horse so well, when you let your muscle memory do some work, when you trust your horse to feel what it is you want, that’s when the best moments are.

Me and our new horse “Cooper” bonding over some bareback grazing time

When you truly understand your horse, and he truly understands you, all you have to do is envision what you want and he'll do it. For me, that connection has been most felt with my horse of a lifetime, Bugatti.

Bugatti and I met when I was 14 years old. He was 4. Both of us were young and gung-ho, ready for whatever challenge lie before us. But also both utterly uneducated in the finer intricacies of Hunter/Jumper style riding. Without the help of two of the most wonderful human beings that I know, my trainers, Dick ("Widg") and Ruth Widger, we never could have accomplished what we did. But under their guidance, Bugatti and I became a team. I trusted him completely, and he trusted me, and both of us trusted the Widgers. Whatever Widg asked us to do, we knew we could do it.

16 years later, Bug and I still have that bond. We've been through a lot together. He went to college with me. He went to Southern California with me when I moved there after college. He moved back to Santa Cruz with me when I had to go back home. And he is with me now, up in Calaveras County.

When he colicked, I was there for him. When he got kicked in the hock by a pasture-mate, I was there. When he tore a tendon in his front leg, I was there, giving him ultrasound treatments, icing his leg, handwalking him, and gradually bringing him back to the level of fitness he enjoyed before his injury.

To me, Bugatti is more than just a pet. Some of the highest highs I have felt in my life have been while on his back, and in some of my lowest lows he has been there, letting me cry into his mane.

And you know what else is awesome? I've gotten to share the joy this wonderful horse has given me with the other amazing people in my life! During my professional career in the horse industry, I got to coach some talented students on Bugatti. I got to watch him teach them more than I could ever teach them with my words and exercises. I've gotten to see him show timid riders how to be fast and win. I've seen him teach little children how to sit on a horse for the first time ever. And just recently, I got to trust him with the care of some of my best girlfriends while some of them sat on or even touched a horse for the very first time! He and our new horse, Cooper (bought for my husband, but let's be real, Cooper is pretty much my horse...) took my buddies down the trail and around the arena, providing fun and laughter for everyone involved, myself included. SUCH. A. FUN. DAY.

Marissa, Mackenzie on Bugatti, and me on Cooper

And you know what they say.. A joy shared is doubled. And these horses have doubled a lot of joy for me over the years.